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A Letter To You

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Dear you,

Yes you. The first boy who held my hand (with so much effort lol)

I write about you all the time. Mostly because I’m afraid of telling you that I love you so much. I still don’t think it’s appropriate to put ‘love’ between us. I mean, just look at us now. We have only known each other for less than a year. But what the hell is this then, if not the word ‘love’ to name it?

Here’s the thing. We trust each other. I trust you as a friend and so do you. For your eyes only, I show you the real side of me. I will be the craziest person you could ever imagine and I’m not afraid to show you all my flaws (hope that you don’t run from me lol). I know I’m not your kind of perfect girl next door. But at least I am who I am when I’m with you.

You know, there were days when I lied to myself that I certainly had no feelings for you, never really knowing why. At that time I absolutely had no idea why I acted so stupid and kept avoiding you in every chance we met. I could’ve just faced it and behaved normally but I chose the other way around-making it even obvious that something was wrong with me.

Not knowing what to do, you treated me the same way as I did to you. We ended up not talking to each other for days.

Then I thought, “Ah, how stupid I am.”

“Why I can’t just be honest to myself?”

“In the end, people always shut me out and they eventually leave me.”

Nothing hurt me more than having to experience the same thing over and over again.

Until one day, you unexpectedly approached me and from then on, we started talking again.

There were nights when I laid awake-wondering how we first met and how in hell it turned to be like this.

The first month, we barely knew each other. Well it was probably me who recognized you first, while you absolutely had no idea who I was. Rumors said that you are the famous musician wannabe a.k.a the one who has the talent to sing like typical American youtuber who loves to cover songs, yeah something like that. Meh, I didn’t really care about rumors anyway so I just let it flow until someone attempted to play your cover through my instagram. It dragged my curiosity even more-knowing that you could also play instrument.

The second month, we were just hanging out together as friends, sharing stories and problems (well it’s actually me who’s dealing with so many problems but you’re willing to listen to all of them anyway. c: ) Somehow, I got my eyes on you since then.

And what about the rest? Actually there were plenty of cute moments of us, like one day when you finally confessed your feeling while we were at ice cream store. It was so out of the blue, like really.

Sometimes, I re-read our conversation and I found myself smiling at my phone’s screen. Remember when we were at the rooftop? I felt like I was in some kind of Korean drama. Well, for some certain reasons, things didn’t go well with me and I didn’t know what to feel anymore, but you managed to comfort me anyway.

All I could tell from your voice when you called me at that time was that you sounded so panic and exhausted—maybe from the fact that you left the guys immediately (even you cancelled your plan with them) and rushed upstairs but found no trace of me at the usual place where I belonged. Aaand it turned out that I had moved to the rooftop. Well, you know, it was the only place where I could cry my eyes out with nobody seeing. And by the time I regained my senses, I found you-standing beside me with your hand laying upon my arm. I was so upset that day, but an embrace from you gave me a sudden warm sensation.

I couldn’t thank you enough for being there by my side when I needed someone to hear my problems, for those late night phone calls and midnight texts, for all those rides home that you offered, for those precious time that you sacrificed to do something for me, for your intention to make me happy, and most importantly, for loving me just the way I am.

Seriously, you should really stop saying sorry for making cheesy pickup lines because just because.

 

 

—A girl who still writes to you, she doesn’t know how not to

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Meet The Artist!

Wow it’s finally 2017!! Just how fast time flies. Before I know it, in the blink of an eye I’ll start a new journey of 2nd semester in college //wow ok gonna be prepared for more and more assignments duh :^)

So there’ll be hella lot of things coming and of course I can’t wait to be a senior yay! Here come to senpai, my dear kawaii kouhai /gets slapped

Aaand here’s a really quick #meettheartist thing + ten facts I did during my spare time ;; uHu I’ve been gaining some new stalkers so hi nice to meet u!

1. I am socially awkward and I often talk to myself a lot

2. I’m terribly insecure no matter what the situation is:^) welpp

3. Perpetually sleep deprived 😪😴

4. I cry easily. I literally cry a bucket everytime I watch sad movies or read sad novels

5. I experience mood swings all the time

6. I’m not afraid to ride any rides in theme park. In fact, I haven’t found a ride that is thrilling enough yet

7. A big no to haunted houses 👻❌

8. My room is a train wreck

9. I am a hug-able person y’know. I hug people a lot and play with their cute faces

10. I play a lot of dating sims yet I still have no date in real life //sobs in the corner

Aight that’s all for today! gonna disappear for a while now :^) peace out homies

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Mystic Messenger: Fangirling intensifies

So lately I’ve been playing this viral game called Mystic Messenger. Seriously, I worked my butt off every single day to unlock the Deep Story. Because of that, I’ve been losing sleep and hourglasses (it freaking costs 80 HG!!)  lol. So far I’ve made it to Day 2 Deep Story. I got bad end for the first time at Casual Route so I replayed it again and got Yoosung’s route. At first, I felt disappointed because I didn’t really feel like playing that sassy dude’s route BUT THEN I started to figure out his charm and beauty through his loving personality and it gave me the chills everytime he called me omgomgomg. And there’s this moment when I was trapped with bomb and he insisted to go with Seven to the hacker’s place but he ended up getting hurt only to protect me(oops sorry for the spoiler) GOSH THAT’S SO TOUCHING I WAS LITERALLY CRYING. So what I’m trying to say is, Yoosung is totally a bae material ❤

After I finished his route, I got Zen’s route and AGAIN, I fell in love with his romantic attitude and affection toward me. I know I’m such a playgirl at this point but I can’t help it lol. Though sometimes his narcissistic personality made me cringe a bit hahah. Overall, he’s just purrrfect. Bless Cheritz for creating those bae material characters.

Here are some fanarts and doodles! Actually I didn’t find them good enough to put on instagram and this blog but since I haven’t uploaded in a while I figured I should liven up my blog a little..haha;;

It’s been forever since the last time I draw something so I’m kinda rusty right now;;;

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Yoosung’s concept draft but faileeed lmao

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This is the fixed one:) eheheh

 

Once I finish Jumin and 707’s routes I may come up with other doodles so just wait for them:)

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How to Doodle (a simple tutorial)

A quick little sketch of whoever-on-my-mind-at-that-time. As you can see, I’m so lack of preparation while making this video. I haven’t had the time to properly do a sketch in months due to my busy preparation to college (ya girl is no longer highschool student, yow). It feels great to simply share my art through this blog, so here’s a little bonus from me. Feel free to share 🙂

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My First Track on Soundcloud

I’m back! (have lost count of how many times i’ve said those words that eventually i’d never mean it lol)

School is getting so fucked up because of its upcoming exams and absentmindedly, I’m getting the hang of it. There is no way I would end up graduating without good marks in result. In other words, I have to study in order to improve my grade in the class. (don’t you ever ask about it. ever)

It just hits me that the hell in disguise called ‘school’spends 70% of my life everyday. Seriously, my head needs to take a break and relax for a while before it will eventually explode in a matter of time (i guess pfft). And this is basically how I spend my entire weekend to be honest. Rolling in the bed lazily, scrolling through facebook newsfeed, following the latest update on instagram, watching drama or maybe just trying something sorta fun, like sleeping over at friend’s house, doing makeover and girly stuff, making YouTube video because hell yeah T.G.I.F. I’m free and I have nothing to do. (not at all)

Okay sooo here I’m promoting my new cover on soundcloud, ehe. I have to admit that rapping isn’t really my best but I’ve always loved to do it over and over again.

This goes without any practice and I’m just simply reading the lyrics from my phone so it obviously sucks, considering the fact that I’m just singing for fun lol. Like they say, “sucking at something is the first step of becoming sorta good at something”. (EHH)

At this point I don’t mind if there’s literally only one person reading this cause it’s my fault for being too busy and practically abandoning this blog for a looooong time :’)

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Random sketch #1

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Hello hello (ノ≧∀≦)ノ

Nozomicchi is back///// ฅ(<ω>*ฅ)

After a very long time of hiatus, finally I have much time to deal with this old-fashioned blog :”>

Errr it has been months since I posted updates, so in today’s post I just wanna show you my slow progress of drawing :”D

Actually I wanna put some stories in it, but I don’t think my awesome imagination will help :^) soo just wait for the upcoming post xD

I’ll probably come with- err.. worth story to read (*´∀`*)

Hahah alright, that’s all I can say for you guys today. Thanks so much for keep following my updates. Love you x

P.S : I drew this in the class and the teacher wanted every student to create a story, so when she was passing by, I told her I was looking for something inspiring by drawing :”> and this sketch was my story xD